Wednesday, February 16, 2005


I Want My...I Want My MVP

Former Red Stocking Mike Greenwell is apparently miffed that Jose Canseco beat him out for AL MVP in 1988 while being on steroids, so Greenwell wants the award taken away and given to him. He certainly has a point. If I lost a game of NBA Street V.3 and found out the winner was using some crazy cheat code or something to break out some uber version of that insane Back-2-Papa move that never ceases to screw me up, I would certainly complain. I'd also be mad if I were to finish second in Family Feud, only to later learn that the winning clan had rubbed a lamp and made some preordained deal with a genie preventing them from losing. That would sure make me want to throttle Louie Anderson's bloated figure.

On the other hand, Mikey needs to get over it. Greenwell finished second to Canseco in the 1988 MVP voting, but Canseco had a superior year in almost every aspect, steroids or no. Canseco's line was .307/391/569, with 42 homers, 40 stolen bases, and 120 runs scored. He was the first player to steal 40 bases and hit 40 home runs in the same season. All this while playing in a tough hitters' park.

Greenwell went .325/.416/.531 while playing in a hitter-friendly park. He wasn't even as good as George Brett or Kirby Puckett that year, which turned out to be the best of his career. Were the steroids really the determining factor in the difference in performance between Canseco and Greenwell? I somehow doubt it, contrary to Canseco's rather unscientific claims that steroids can make you a "super-athlete".

Look, far be it from me to defend a numbskull like Canseco, but I just think that once you start putting asterisks on things, you open the door for all kinds of goofy second guessing. Should we take away the Mets' 1986 championship because the whole team was hooked on "greenies"? Should we deprive Tim Raines of his 1981-84 stolen base titles because he allegedly sniffed cocaine in between innings and carried vials of the narcotic in his back pockets during games? Hey, man, that smack can make you run like lightning, don't cha know? If Moises Alou were to somehow shatter Hack Wilson's RBI record, should we put an asterisk on that because he pisses on his hands before every game? It never ends. If we go ahead and give Greenwell the 1988 MVP, why don't we go ahead and give Darryl Strawberry the '88 NL MVP, since he was way more deserving than Kirk Gibson was. Them sour grapes taste bad, there Mr. Greenwell?

Mike Greenwell sucks. The happiest day of any Red Sox fans' life was when he finally broke and was sent to japan for a bottle of stale sake. its funny that he thinks he deserves anything.
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